I’m not someone who generally suffers from insomnia. I go right to sleep and if I get awakened, I go right back to sleep. But since Trump’s inauguration, my sleep has been fitful and I’ve had wakeful wee hours in the morning. The world feels like it’s spinning out of control and I am helpless to do much of anything about it. And it would be so easy to go back to abusing food around this.
But I’m not going to do that. Here’s why:
• Overeating and bingeing on sugar will bring only the most temporary of relief (a few minutes at best).
• It will not change anything in the world or the political climate.
• It will promptly put me back in the land of guilt and shame and self-loathing, which is not a happy place.
• In addition to worrying about the world, I’ll be worrying about my health again.
If I stay in recovery, follow my food plan, abstain from sugars and flours and snacks, I will stay awake. And the world desperately needs all of us to stay awake, to participate in our lives and our culture. Going numb will do no one, including me, any good. Not any good that counts.
It’s tempting to go numb. Those in power want us to be numb, to not care. So in a way, it’s revolutionary to stay awake, to stay alert, to stay sober and abstinent. And it’s one small thing I can do.
What would be revolutionary for you about staying awake and not numbing out with food?